In looking back to my 20s, 30s, or 40s, I wish I had listened to wiser and older women about creating a life of meaning, creativity, and joy. It would have saved me a lot of wasted time, grief, and misery. And it would have given me clarity, calmness, focus, and confidence as I journeyed through this tumultuous world of ours.
Here are some truths that I want to share with women under 50. Please feel free to share this with your younger women friends and family.
- REMEMBER YOU ONLY HAVE ONE LIFE - this is not a dress rehearsal. Use your time wisely and don't fritter away with things that really don't matter.
- THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN A PERFECT BODY - By the time women get to their 40s, they've hopefully given up the notion that happiness exists within a certain shape or size. I have fought the battle of the bulge most of my life. I can tell you that if you eat a balanced diet and get some sort of exercise you will feel better about yourself. I'm still working on this one.
- PRACTICE SELF-CARE - We tend to put others first before our own needs. Remember that practicing self-care is not selfish. It’s a necessity if you want to lead a rich and rewarding life.
- AGING IS INEVITABLE - I'm not saying I plan to age without putting up a good fight (goodness knows I spend enough money on serums and creams each month), but beyond that, I am proud of the life experiences, both good and challenging, that those lines reflect.
- COMMIT TO A HEALTHY LIFESTYLE - It may shock you but the fact is that 95 percent of all diseases are related to lifestyle choices. Taking the time to de-stress, exercise, and have good nutrition, along with healthy relationships can lead to healthy living.
- SURROUND YOURSELF WITH FRIENDS AND FAMILY THAT SUPPORT YOU - Being around negative, judgmental, or energy vampires can deplete your energy. Stop making excuses for keeping toxic people in your life.
- LEARN TO SAY "NO" - This is difficult for many women to do. Kids' school, extracurricular programs, and relationships can deplete you. It takes practice to say 'no' but once you get the hang of it, you’ll be delighted at how doing this will free up your schedule and energy to do things that you really want to.
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- LOVE AND ACCEPT YOURSELF - You are beautiful and loving, The more you think of yourself in this way, you will appreciate your authentic self.
- BE GRATEFUL FOR EVERYTHING - If you are grateful for every little thing in your life, your demeanor will be happier and it will show to others. Write down in a journal something you are grateful for every morning. It's easy to get started but after a while, you will be searching for something to be grateful for. It doesn't have to be something grand, it could be flowers you had seen in the yard the day before.
- TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR LIFE - Blaming external circumstances for not being happy with yourself or your life will keep you stuck, frustrated, and angry. Replace the "If only..." or blaming others when something doesn't go smoothly with “I am responsible for my own life and I choose to create an extraordinary one.”
- STOP WORRYING ABOUT WHAT OTHERS THINK OF YOU - If you’re someone who needs acceptance from others, it’s time to change that. Spending that time will not only drain your energy but will keep you from getting to the best parts of yourself. You don't need approval from others to complete yourself.
- BE PRESENT - Put your phone down. Enjoy the time you have with those that you're with. You won't get that time back.
- BE MORE FORGIVING - So many of us are holding deep grudges and hurt inside—even when apologies have taken place. Let it go! You’ll be surprised at how quickly your feelings of anger and judgment towards yourself and others dissipate. You’ll go from feeling hurt, isolated, and stuck to experiencing a rush of positive energy, relief, openheartedness, and compassion.
- DREAM MORE - If you set your mind to it, believe in yourself, and take action, you’ll find the way to create an extraordinary life. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!
- SOME PROBLEMS SHOULD STAY SMALL -
You've heard the phrase: 'Don't sweat the small stuff.' It is true! When you hit 40, you understand that not every battle should be fought. Some aren't a priority and difficult people are just not worth your time and energy. - DON'T TAKE YOURSELF SO SERIOUSLY - Knowing how to integrate fun, laughter, and playfulness into your everyday life is not only a boost for the soul but is shown to electrify creativity and enable you to develop deeper connections with others. Think about it: after you’ve had a good laugh, don’t you feel more light-hearted, happier, and able to continue your day with more ease.